Boston Rob is adorable and charming as ever, albeit with some marriage weight. But it’s okay, I’ve seen it happen. Or should I say I’m seeing it happen? Whatevs.
The tribal council was one of the best christenings to a season of Survivor that I’ve ever seen. But like, chill out people.
Hang on the beach like Rob, you have 39 days.
I’m so glad they cast David Alan Grier as Halitosis Phil. His crazy "Special Agent" dry mouth role is played to perfection.
As you can see from the diagram provided, there is something really scary going on with his stretched out undies and I’m scared that one of these days his junk will pop out and I will go blind.
Did this happen overnight or did he know of his condition?
Cheapelasticosis hurts everyone.
I hope he's "getting treatment for it" too.
Yuckiest Moment Award goes to Kristina.
Or Pitbull, which she likes to be called. Um, what’s up with all the female testosterone this season? What woman LIKES to be called a pitbull?
I’d rather go by a “bitch” dog like a pomeranian. Suits me better.
STOP doing that nasty shit woman.
And CBS, did you really have to subject us to a whole 11 seconds of her taking a tree trunk to her plaque?!
Worst Fashion Award goes to Ralph.
His “man-sweater” as Mike called it, is just a mess.
If you’re going to sport one at all it should be fuller. I saw sparse patches of something furry and then patches of naked skin? Not cool.
I want to see full-on all-around two inch thick man-sweater or I want nothing at all.
Take care of that Ralphie. I’d hate to hear one day that your back hair got caught in the snaps of a flag-pole and you mortally wounded yourself.
Some Hooked-On-Phonics Tips:
- FRANCESCA: “fran-CHESS-ka” (fran - rhymes with and ran ka - rhymes with pa) so get it right Halitosis Phil.
- ASTERISK: “ass-tur-ISK” (I love you Jeff Probst, but you almost made me cry).
I like Julie so far although she has had zero air time.
But I’ve figured out what Julie looks like.
I mean, who.
I’ve figured out who she looks like. I always loved Beauty and The Beast.
I guess what I meant was “a very superficial closing thought”.