Saturday, June 19, 2010

Happy Father's Day


When he died he took with him many titles.



Once a husband,


a son,


friend and neighbor,


and most of all...dad.



My mother so broken barely holding back tears,


like a child who’d been bullied,


left alone by her peers.


He'd been her first lover, her first taste of sugar, her hero, her future, her world.



My brother so rigid like the coffin


was his instead of our father’s...


Jaw clenched, fists balled up so tight,


my brother was ready...steady...fight!



But the fight was long over, lost by dear dad,


our once fearsome foursome down to three, all we had


were the tears racing and burning and tickling our faces,


like salt water does when it dries and leaves traces...



Traces of moments


now long disappeared...


unicorns, tooth fairies,


even things once feared.



Gone now six years from our world as we know it.


Never forget...the salt stinging and piercing things missing and taken,


my father now gone, so are the tears on our faces...


belong to the world disappeared, leaving traces.



When I disappear


I will see him and ask,


ask him what world we are in,


what this place is.



RIP Daddy, 6/14/2003

New Priorities...Bad News and Good News

I am sorry to say that I have spoken to soon about blogging again for BBDish. I was very excited to be back for the summer and dish on the newest season of Big Brother...

But, there are two men in my life, and my life, that I need to focus on.

One, my grandfather, needs me around as much as possible as we are unsure as to how long he will actually be with us.

He's a good man, and a wonderful grandfather, and I cannot deprive him of his favorite grandgirl (me). It just wouldn't be right, haha. Losing my father was softened by the fact that I spent his last year with him with my Big Brother winnings. Everything happens for a reason.

Happy Father's Day to everyone...we all celebrate it in our own way, so own it and enjoy!!

And, the other man I speak of is also a good man, and a wonder in my life. His name is Davy Goethals and he came into my life when I was least expecting my heart to be captured. New love needs attention and care and long distances require even more. Given a choice, it's love over blogging.

It's always love. And I love Davy.

I will review as much as I can, and I am sure I will have zingers every week but it's not fair for me to commit to a platform such as BBDish and not be able to deliver.

Stay tuned for my season premiere review July 9th...we will all be watching the night before, and I promise you some choice words the next day!

Monday, June 14, 2010

For Those Who Can't Access...


Can be accessed through: http://www.tvgrapevine.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=6639

I have left all comments (including the last, my own) that follow the article...I am what I am :)

Big Brother 12: Jun Song DishesPDFPrintE-mail
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Written by Jilly
Saturday, 12 June 2010 12:12

Jun Song - Big Brother 12Big Brother 12
Jun Song Dishes
by Jilly

I had the pleasure of catching up with the winner of Big Brother 4, Jun Song, and I was able to ask some of the questions we as fans may have been wondering about. Jun dishes What happens when a house guest gets the information they were picked for the show up until the moment they step into the Big Brother house? Read on and find out!

How did they contact you to let you know you were chosen? (phone call or house visit)
- Oh, by phone. They wouldn’t waste money on a house visit. There’s plenty of time for that sh*t later when they actually come to collect your ass.

Were you told you were definitely chosen or are you told you are a possible alternate?
- Ew, I would never accept an “alternate” anything as a title. I was told I was IN. I knew at that point the $500K was MINE.

Was there anyone at all that you were allowed to tell?
- No. The rules were rigid back then. “Back in my day” HG identities were kept a secret. I told my boss and one person from Human Resources at work, and they both had to sign Confidentiality Agreements.

Did you secretly confide in someone? (parent, sig other?)
- Of course I did. HAHAHAHA. Screw my parents, I told my brother, my cousin, my most recent ex and my closest GF. That’s it. I was NOT going to f*ck it up.

Did you go shopping for new clothes and if so, did that make anyone suspicious?
- Oh please, I shop all the time so no suspicions. The only items\ I shopped for were bikinis…I didn’t want to get caught wearing the same one over and over again…I wish I could say the same for the other chicks in the house. Ew.

What were the clothing restrictions they gave you? (no white shirts, no logos) were there any other restrictions?
- Definitely no logos, and if you had collegiate gear, you had to actually have attended the school.

How many bags did they allow you to have?
- ONE bag and then the BB bag. That was the hardest part. Shoes, clothes, toiletries for three months in one bag?! I packed an “immigration” bag hahahaha.

How did you explain the suitcase you had packed to other people in your house?(assuming there were some)
- I lived alone so it didn’t matter. Besides, I’m so spontaneous, none of my friends would question my packing my life up and going somewhere on a whim!

Who picked you up on the day you had to leave?
- There was a small crew that came to get me…a producer/PA, cameraman and one other person I think. IDK, it was such a blur!!!

Was there any conversation during the ride? (if it was someone other than a taxi driver)
- Not much at all. The staff have perfected the art of revealing NOTHING. You’d think they were harboring a friggin’ fugitive!

Assuming you flew to Ca. since you live in NY. who picked you up at the airport?
- All pick-ups are by a car service used by CBS…sometimes limos too, they love using the limos. But it’s not like I minded! Haha

Was the first location you went to the only place you stayed until you entered the house?
- Yup. It was like a rehab center for celebrities. So secluded and no way for anyone to get/see inside…kinda creepy if you ask me. I was like a hostage and sh*t.

How long were you sequestered?
- Well, I believe it was just a few days…I remember having to listen to fireworks from afar…and wondering what my friends/family were doing for the 4th of July back at home. How sad. I never got to leave the room, let alone the building.

Did they give you any coaching while sequestered as to what role you may be playing in the house? (You're the jock, or the spunky chic, etc.?)
- No coaching. They choose you for a reason, because you already fit something they’re looking for. If they have to coach you by then, you shouldn’t be there anyway.

Were you able to talk with a family member over the phone at all during sequester?
- HELL NO. We handed over anything personal…sigh…

Were you allowed to go out of your room?
- NOPE. The doors are taped so they can verify you were a good boy/girl. Why you would risk losing your spot in the house at that time I don’t know. I followed all the ruuuuules!

Who did you have contact with? (producer, staff? etc.)
- We had no contact except via the telephone with various Production Assitants, and then the day before they come into your room to go through your belongings. That’s where you get things taken away from you (i.e. logos, certain make-up, etc..like my eyeliner pencils…cuz they don’t want to risk you “writing” notes to other HGs)

How were your meals provided?
- All over the telephone…through a production assistant…sigh…”Hello, today we’re ordering from____ what would you like?”

Did they keep you occupied somehow and if so how?
- The TVs were taken away from our rooms so the game had already kinda started…we were provided with DVDs and DVD players though. Sigh. No magazines, newspapers, news, nothing!!!

Did they provide you with previous seasons to watch?
- Nope. But the exes were. I’m still pissed about that. I was a fan and wanted to be there and the exes, all they had to do was have f*cked us in a previous life?! Ew. They had no chance anyway…

Did you know exactly when you would be taken to the BB house for the game to begin?
- We knew NOTHING. We were told when to sleep, eat, get dressed, get in the cars to go god-knows-where…

Were any items given to you from the staff for you to bring into the house?
- Nope. Except the dreaded microphone that was attached to us like hemmorhoids.

Were you told anything at all about the other people that were joining you in the house?
- Nope. And during the “audition” process we were forbidden to communicate with each other. Everything is very legit, and highly highly organized. CBS rocks.

Did you ever see any of the other hg's before you stood outside the house waiting to go in?
- During the final rounds of auditions we stayed at the same hotel so we would see each other yes, but we were NEVER to talk to each other. Eye contact was key though…that’s when I made “contact” with Jack and Dana. It’s amazing what the eyes and other body language reveal…


I'd like to thank Jun for taking the time to answer all of our questions and with such great humor! I know she will be watching Big Brother 12 right along with all of us!

Comments 6Add Comment
Swampy
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written by TerriH, June 12, 2010
Jun your sense of HaHa has always cracked me up. Thank you and TVGrapevine!
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Swampy
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written by Matt, June 12, 2010
I thought I knew it all about the pre BB stuff but never realized it was so impersonal!!!
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written by Kim, June 12, 2010
I love you Jun! Best winner right there.
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Swampy
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written by ChristineZZ, June 13, 2010
Jun and TVG are always my #1 favorite combo
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written by ma2qua, June 14, 2010

I'm SO disappointed that of all the houseguests over all of the seasons of BB you chose Jun to interview. Even though she offered some informative insights, I watched her over the LiveFeeds when she was in the house .. and particularly the last two weeks when there were only a couple people in the house so Jun was in most of the feeds, and she was one of the most NASTY, NEGATIVE, B*TCHY and DOWNRIGHT HORRIBLE people I've had the misfortune to watch; so much so that even after all of these years later, just the mention of her name makes my skin crawl. She is a FOUL person, and I hope to not see or hear her name again. However, on a brighter note, I'm SO looking forward to BB12 to begin!!!!!
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Well
written by Jun BB4, June 14, 2010
Well, i'm sorry you feel that way ma2qua. I am what I am. And you never know a person until you spend time with them.

I would like to dare you to get ON Big Brother and WIN and then we can talk about nastiness and negativity and bitchiness and "downright horribleness" that well, is part of life. And I shared that with you. No apologies. smilies/smiley.gif